Winter brings shorter days, longer nights, and colder temperatures. Bundle up and read the funniest winter jokes to make everyone laugh.
Winter is a wonderful time of the year. Yes, there are shorter days and colder temperatures.
But winter also brings snow, comfort, warmth, and time with people you love.
Watching the snowfall is one of the most calming activities. A snowflake can take up to two hours to hit the ground from a cloud.
Slow down, rest, and laugh. The following are the funniest winter jokes everyone will love.
The funniest winter jokes
1. Why was the snowman looking in the bag of carrots?
He was picking his nose.
2. What falls at the North Pole without getting hurt?
3. What do snowmen eat for lunch?
4. What did the icy road say to the car?
Let’s go for a spin.
5. What does a gingerbread man put on his bed?
A cookie sheet.
6. How do mountains stay warm?
They put on their snowcaps.
7. What bites without teeth?
8. Where do snowmen get information?
9. Which is faster, hot or cold?
Hot because you can catch a cold.
10. What do you call a slow skier?
11. What do you eat when you’re cold, hungry, and angry?
A brr grr.
12. What do you call a cat on ice?
A cool cat.
13. Why did the boy only wear one snow boot?
There was a 50% chance of snow.
14. Why are there no penguins in Britain?
They’re scared of Wales.
15. What do you call a polar bear in the rain?
A drizzly bear.
16. What does a barbershop serve in the winter?
17. What kind of math do Snowy Owls do best?
18. How does a carpenter fix things at the North Pole?
Igloos it together.
19. Why do skeletons hate winter?
They get chilled to the bone.
20. What do you call the tallest building in Antarctica?
An ice scraper.
21. Where do seals go to watch movies?
22. What’s the worst thing about global warming if you live in an igloo?
23. What’s a snowman’s favorite drink?
24. How do you warn one of Santa’s helpers?
Check your elf before you wreck your elf.
25. What do you call a winter monster with a six-pack?
The abdominal snowman.
26. Why should you not owe Santa money?
He snows where you live.
27. What’s the best advice for snow moving to the big city?
Flake it till you make it.
28. What happened when an icicle landed on the person’s head?
It knocked them out cold.
29. What do you call a line of rabbits hopping backward in the snow?
A receding hare line.
30. What do snowmen do on Christmas?
Play with snow angels.
31. What does a math teacher do in the snow?
Make snow angles.
32. What do you call a snowman who knows everything?
33. What kind of androids do you find in the Arctic?
34. What did the snowman do at home?
Nothing. He just chilled.
35. What’s a sheep’s favorite Christmas song?
36. How was the snow globe feeling?
A little shaken.
37. What do you call a snowman who tells tales?
38. What kind of cake do snowmen like to eat?
Any with thick icing.
39. What do you call a snowman party?
40. What kind of diet did the snowman go on?
The meltdown diet.
41. Why do bees stay in the hive during winter?
42. What happens when winter arrives?
43. What do snowmen eat with fries?
44. Who delivers Christmas presents to young sharks?
45. Why did Mickey Mouse get hit with a snowball?
Because Donald Ducked.
46. Why should you not start a ski resort?
It’s a slippery slope.
47. Who’s a penguin’s favorite relative?
48. What did one snowman ask the other?
Can you smell carrot?
49. What’s a snowman’s favorite school activity?
Snow and tell.
50. What do you call a snowman without a carrot?
51. How do restaurants handle outdoor seating in the winter?
Frost come, frost served.
52. Why are snowmen great at parties?
They always break the ice.
53. What happens when you milk a cow in the winter?
Ice cream comes out.
54. What happens to a Greyhound bus in the winter?
The dog rides inside the bus.
55. Where do you learn about the history of ice cream?
56. What did the snow plower say in the winter?
57. What’s a snowman’s favorite game?
Ice Spy with My Little Eye.
58. Where’s scold?
59. Have you seen icy?
60. Which video game can you play in an igloo?
Any, but snow Fortnite.
61. What did Frosty the Snowman do for a living?
He was in the snow business.
62. Why did Guns N’ Roses not show up for the concert?
63. What did Spiderman wear in the winter?
A Peter Parka.
64. Why do programmers love winter?
There are no bugs.
65. Do you know what’s cool?
66. When’s the best time to catch snowflakes with your tongue?
After all the birds fly south.
67. What does Santa say when he walks backward?
Oh, oh, oh.
68. What happens to body fat after winter?
It becomes spring rolls.
69. What did one penguin do after getting in a fight with the other?
It gave the other the cold shoulder.
70. How do you catch an Arctic hare?
Use a hare net.
71. How do you tell someone to make eye contact with you in the winter?
Look me in the ice.
72. What did the snowflakes say to the road?
Let’s stick together.
73. Why’s it best to experiment with thin ice?
It’s the easiest to have a breakthrough.
74. Did you hear about the snowman who fell in love with a mitten?
It was glove at first sight.
75. Why can’t you trust snowmen?
76. Did you hear about the snowman with a lisp?
He came. He thaw. He conquered.
77. What does a snowman take when he gets sick?
A chill pill.
78. Why do arctic seals and penguins not get along?
They’re polar opposites.
79. Why do mummies like presents?
Because of the wrappings.
80. What did the officer say after catching a snowman stealing?
81. What kind of clothes do caribou calves wear?
82. How are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean?
Both are below C level.
83. How do you know if there’s a snowman in your bed?
You wake up wet.
84. How do you know a snowman was in your home?
You find a carrot next to the fireplace.
85. Has the abominable snowman called?
86. Why do people put money in the freezer during the winter?
To have cold hard cash.
87. What do you call a snowman that plays piano in the sun?
88. What do you call a person alone in Antarctica?
89. Why does the alphabet get shorter at Christmas?
90. What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Frosted Flakes and Ice Crispies.
91. How do snowmen greet each other?
Ice to meet you.
92. What do you call a ghost in the winter?
93. Why didn’t the whistleblower go outside during the winter?
He was Snowden.
94. Where do polar bears keep their money?
95. Where’s the best place to keep a fire?
96. What does a gingerbread man use to pay for things?
97. What did the snowman order at Wendy’s?
98. What’s the best way to not get cold feet in the winter?
Don’t walk around brr-footed.
99. Why are winter jokes not funny?
It’s snow joke.
100. How do people pray in the winter?
101. What do you call a sled that belongs to Bob?
102. How does a German skier cry for help?
103. How does a snowman get to work?
He rides a b-icicle.
104. What do you call a snowman’s dog?
A slush puppy.
105. What did the investigator say to the snowman?
Icy right through your lies.
106. Why could the bear not keep a job?
It keeps disappearing in the winter.
107. How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
Look for fresh prints.
108. What do trees say after a long winter?
What a re-leaf.
109. What’s an ig?
It’s a house made of ice but without a loo.
110. What type of Mexican food do snowmen love to eat?
111. How do you scare a snowman?
Point a hair dryer at him.
112. What’s white and goes up?
A confused snowflake.
113. Why do birds fly south for the winter?
It’s too far to walk.
114. What do snowmen win at the Olympics?
115. Who were Frosty’s parents?
Mom and pop-sicle.
116. What do you call a cow that lives in the snow?
117. What do you call a snowman on wheels?
118. What does December have that no other month does?
The letter D.
119. Why did the girl keep her trumpet in the snow?
She liked playing cool jazz.
120. What do snowmen call their kids?
121. What do you call a snowman having a temper tantrum?
122. What do you call a snowman in the summer?
123. What do you get when you cross Jack Frost and Dracula?
Winter jokes for adults
1. I just ran over one of Snow White’s dwarfs?
He wasn’t Happy.
2. What’s the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?
3. What do you get after sitting on ice for too long?
4. Why does Santa always come through the chimney?
He knows better than to try the back door.
5. What do you call Santa’s helpers?
6. How’s Christmas like a typical day at work?
You do all the work, and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit.
7. Is your name Jingle Bells?
Because you look ready to go all the way.
8. Why did the Grinch rob the liquor store?
He was desperate for holiday spirit.
9. What do you call an elf wearing earmuffs?
Whatever you want. He can’t hear you.
10. What do you get when you deep-fry Santa Claus?
Related: Funny Nature Puns to Make You Laugh
Featured image by David Em/Box of Puns.
About David Em
David Em is the Founder and Lead Punster of Box of Puns, which he created to add more laughter and humor to life.