75+ Laffy Taffy Jokes (Super Silly and Funny)

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Laffy Taffy is a chewy candy invented in the 1970s. Laffy Taffy jokes are hilarious, and you’ll get a good laugh while eating a sweet treat.

Laffy Taffy is iconic. The vibrant packaging, chewy texture, sugary taste, and hilarious jokes make it what it is.

Related: The Best Candy Puns

Some might say the jokes are better than the candy. It’s up for debate.

The following is a complete collection of hilarious and silly Laffy Taffy jokes.

Laffy Taffy candy.
Photo by David Em/Box of Puns.

The best Laffy Taffy jokes of all-time

1. How does a cyclist train for a race?

He recycles.

2. What did the mouse use to build his house?

“Cottage” cheese.

Related: The Funniest Cheese Puns (Not Too Cheesy, All Grate)

3. Which day of the week is the moon’s least favorite?

Sunday

4. What kind of tea is sometimes hard to swallow?

Reality.

5. Why did the sun go to school?

It wanted to be brighter.

6. Why don’t lobsters share?

Because they are shellfish.

7. How did the bones cross the street?

They didn’t. The dogs ate them.

8. What street does a ghost live on?

A dead end.

Related: Ghost Puns That’ll Leave You Laughing Non-Stop

9. How do you get the water into watermelon?

Plant it in the spring.

10. Why was the boy covered in gift wrap?

His mom told him to “live in the present”.

11. Where did the dentist go on his vacation?

To the mouth of the Mississippi.

12. How do you make an orange laugh?

Tickle its navel.

13. What’s a potatoes favorite game?

Hash-tag.

14. Why did the apple turnover?

Because it got jealous of the jelly roll.

15. What did one window say to the other window?

I’m in “pane”.

16. What do you deserve and is also a type of bagel?

Everything.

17. Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?

Because then it would be a foot.

18. How come the Buffalo Bills went to the bank?

To get their quarter back.

Related: The Best Puns About Sports

19. What is the best way to keep water from running?

Don’t pay the water bill.

20. Why couldn’t the skeleton add 1+1?

Because it didn’t have a brain.

21. What’s an owl’s favorite subject?

Owlgebra.

22. In what month do people talk the least?

February because it’s the shortest month of the year.

23. How do you get an alien baby to sleep?

You rocket.

24. What has a head, a tail, but no body?

A coin.

25. What prize do you get for putting your phone on vibrate?

The no bell prize.

26. When does a doctor get mad?

When they run out of patients.

27. What kind of shoes do frogs wear?

Open-toed.

28. What did Jon do when his dog ate his science book?

He took the words right out of his mouth.

29. What do you call a nun sleep walking?

A roamin’ Catholic.

30. What do you call an owl that has armor on?

A knight owl.

Related: The Best Owl Puns (They’re a Hoot)

31. What gets wet while it dries?

A towel.

32. Why did the man take a hammer to bed?

He wanted to hit the sack.

33. When can peanuts laugh?

When you crack them up.

34. What kind of candy gives you the giggles?

Laffy Taffy.

35. Which candy can’t get anywhere on time?

Choco-late!

36. Why is a lost Dalmatian easily found?

Because it’s always spotted.

37. What did yes say to no?

Maybe.

38. What would you do without your memories?

Forget.

39. What animal talks the most?

A yak.

40. How do bulls write?

With a bullpen.

41. What’s thin, white, and scary?

Homework.

42. What’s the definition of a farmer?

Someone who’s good in their field.

43. What did the hurricane say to the island?

I’ve got my eye on you.

44. Why was the cat afraid of the tree?

Because of its bark.

Related: Hilarious and Paw-some Dog Puns

45. When do you stop at green and go at red?

When you’re eating a watermelon.

46. How do you turn soup into gold?

Add 24 carrots.

47. What happened after David’s ID was stolen?

We had to call him Dav.

48. What do you call a happy cowboy?

A jolly rancher.

49. What did the egg say to the frying pan?

You crack me up.

50. Where does an alien get its milk?

The Milky Way.

51. Which garden has the most vegetables?

Flash garden.

52. What did the tree say to the wind?

“Leaf” me alone!

53. What do you call a cow with a twitch?

Beef jerky.

54. Why is it so hot in a stadium after a football game?

All the fans have left.

55. Why did Billy take a ruler to bed with him?

To see how long he slept.

56. What’s Labor Day?

That’s when mom’s have their babies.

57. What’s a parasite?

A place you go in Paris.

58. How do billboards talk?

Sign language.

59. Why do shoemakers go to heaven?

They have good soles.

60. How do you heal a broken jack-o’-lantern?

With a pumpkin patch.

61. How do you communicate with a fish?

You drop it a line.

62. Where can you find an ocean without water?

On a map.

63. Why do hamburgers fly south for winter?

To keep their buns from freezing.

64. Why did the student eat his homework?

The teacher said it was a piece of cake.

65. Why is a bad joke like a bad pencil?

It has no point.

66. What kind of tree grows in your hand?

A palm tree.

Related: The Most Hilarious Puns About Trees

67. How did dinosaurs decorate their bedroom?

With reptiles.

68. What did police officers say to their stomach?

I’ve got you under a vest.

69. What did the cheerleader say to the ghost?

Show some spirit.

70. What did the skunk say when the wind direction changed?

It’s all coming back to me now.

71. What building has the most stories?

The library.

72. Why couldn’t the shoes go out and play?

They were all tied up.

73. What did the lunch lady say to Luke Skywalker?

Use the forks, Luke.

Related: Star Wars Puns You Need to Read

74. What word is always spelled incorrectly?

Incorrectly.

75. Why didn’t the leopard go on vacation?

It couldn’t find the right spot.

76. What do you call a pile of cats?

Meowtain.

77. What’s the best way to raise a child?

In an elevator.

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Featured image by David Em/Box of Puns.