40+ Out-Of-The-Park Sports Jokes

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Win or lose, you can always feel better by reading funny sports jokes. Whether it’s an individual or team sport, you’ll want to share them.

Different sports equipment on grass.
Photo courtesy of Canva.

Hilarious sports jokes

1. Why did the soccerball leave the team?

It was tired of being kicked around.

2. What can you serve, but never eat?

A tennis ball.

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3. What did the glove say to the baseball?

Catch you later.

4. Where do football players dance?

At the foot-ball.

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5. Why do pitchers raise one leg when they throw a baseball?

If they raise both, they’d fall.

6. Why don’t fish play basketball or soccer?

They’re scared of nets.

7. What’s the best way to light up a soccer stadium?

With a soccer match.

8. Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarter-back.

9. How did the golfer do today?

Tee-riffic.

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10. Where’s the largest diamond in New York?

Yankee Stadium.

11. What’s a bird’s favorite sport?

Cricket.

12. How do football players deal with problems?

They deal with them head-on.

13. What position do ghosts play in soccer?

Ghoul-keeper.

14. Why are hockey players always cold on the ice?

There are so many fans.

15. Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?

In case they get a hole in one.

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16. Why did the baseball team hire a baker?

They needed a new batter.

17. Why was the basketball court wet?

The players kept dribbling all over it.

18. Did you hear about the NBA referee that got fired?

I heard he’s a whistleblower.

19. Why aren’t sports played in the jungle?

There are too many cheetahs.

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20. Where’s the safest place to keep your important belongings?

A pole vault.

21. What insect shouldn’t play football?

Fumble-bees.

22. What do soccer players drink when they get in trouble?

A penal-tea shot.

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23. Why are ice rinks round?

A rectangle or square would be 90-degrees, which means it would melt.

24. Why are hockey players good at making friends?

They break the ice quickly.

25. Why can’t you trust baseball players at an instrument store?

They’ll steal a bass.

26. Why don’t basketball teams want a pig?

It’d be a ball hog.

27. What are volleyballs scared of?

Spikes.

28. What’s a sheep’s favorite sport?

Baa-dminton.

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29. Why won’t you see a lacrosse player in front of a restaurant?

They like to go behind the back.

30. Why should you stay away from a volleyball player?

They attack.

31. Where do catchers sit when they eat?

Behind the plate.

32. Why couldn’t the all-star athlete listen to music?

They broke all the records.

33. What does a bicycle call its dad?

Pop-cycle.

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34. Why are frogs so good at basketball?

They make all of the jump shots.

35. Who won the race between the two waves?

Neither, they tide.

36. How does a hockey player kiss?

They pucker up.

37. Why did the baseball player only spend five minutes at the mall?

It was a shortstop.

38. Why is racquetball a loud sport?

The players raise a racquet.

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39. Why are Canadians good at sports?

They always bring their eh game.

40. How did the barber win the race?

He took the shortcut.

41. What do sprinters eat before a race?

Fast food.

42. What should you avoid in a football stadium to ensure you don’t get stuck?

The tight end.

43. Which baseball player can hold the most water?

The pitcher.

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Featured image courtesy of Canva.