50+ Best and Funniest SpongeBob Quotes


SpongeBob SquarePants is a popular American animated comedy TV series on Nickelodeon. Read the best and funniest SpongeBob quotes.

SpongeBob SquarePants toy characters.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.

SpongeBob SquarePants is a TV series about SpongeBob and his friends living in Bikini Bottom, a fictional underwater city. It was one of the most popular animated TV shows throughout the 1990s and early 2000s.

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SpongeBob and his friends are hilarious and legendary. The following are the best and funniest SpongeBob SquarePants quotes.

Hilarious SpongeBob quotes

1. “If you believe in yourself, with a tiny pinch of magic all your dreams can come true!” -SpongeBob

2. “Wake me up when I care.” -Squidward

3. “Can I be excused for the rest of my life?” -SpongeBob

4. “Goodbye everyone, I’ll remember you all in therapy.” -Plankton

5. “Well, it may be stupid, but it’s also dumb.” -Patrick

6. Caller: Is this the Krusty Krab?
Patrick: No, this is Patrick.

7. “I’m ugly and I’m proud!” -SpongeBob

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8. “You never really know the true value of a moment, until it becomes a memory.” -SpongeBob

9. “Always follow your heart unless your heart is bad with directions.” -SpongeBob

10. “You’ll never get what you want if you always let people step on you.” -Plankton

11. “With imagination, you can be anything you want.” -SpongeBob

12. “Home is where you’re surrounded by other critters that care about you.” -Sandy Cheeks

13. “Sometimes we have to go deep inside ourselves to solve our problems.” -Patrick

14. “We shall never deny a guest, even the most ridiculous request.” -Mr. Krabs

15. “We don’t need television…not as long as we have our imagination.” -SpongeBob

16. “Gary, I’m absorbing his blows like I’m made of some sort of spongy material.” -SpongeBob

17. “What doesn’t kill you, usually succeeds in the second attempt.” -Mr. Krabs

18. “It’s not always what you say that matters, sometimes it’s what you don’t say.” -Mr. Krabs

19. “No one can change a person, but someone can be a reason for that person to change.” -SpongeBob

20. “Squidward that’s not the peace treaty, that’s a copy of the peace treaty.” -SpongeBob

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21. “I guess hibernation is the opposite of beauty sleep!” -Patrick

22. “After going on your life-changing journey, you now realize that you don’t want what you thought you wanted. What you really wanted was inside you all along.” -Squidward

23. “Fortunately, I have enough talent for all of you.” -Squidward

24. “Don’t you DARE take the name of Texas in vain.” -Sandy Cheeks

25. “So much later that the old narrator got tired of waiting and they had to hire a new one.” -New Narrator

26. “The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.” -Patrick

27. “If I were to die right now in a fiery explosion due to the carelessness of a friend, then it would just be alright.” -SpongeBob

28. “Knowledge cannot replace friendship.” -Patrick

29. “You’re good. You’re good. You’re good!” -SpongeBob

30. “Did you smell it? That smell. A kind of smelly smell. The smelly smell that smells…smelly.” -Mr. Krabs

31. “It’s just a cruel reminder that I’m single and likely to remain that way forever.” -Squidward

32. “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” -Patrick

33. “Too bad SpongeBob’s not here to enjoy Spongebob not being here.” -Squidward

34. “The best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time.” -SpongeBob

35. “Look at all the hip young people eating sal-ads.” -SpongeBob

36. “Being grown-up is boring. Besides, I don’t ‘get’ jazz.” -Patrick

36. “SpongeBob is the only guy I know who can have fun with a jellyfish…for 12 hours!” -Squidward

38. “I’ve waited years for this moment. I’m gonna go in there, march straight up to the manager, look at him straight in the eye, lay it on the line, and – I can’t do it!” -Patrick

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39. Spongebob: Patrick, you’re a genius!

Patrick: Yeah, I get called that a lot.

Spongebob: What? A genius?

Patrick: No, Patrick.

40. “Karen, baby, I haven’t felt this giddy since the day you agreed to be my wife!” -Plankton

41. “Hello? Where’d everybody go? Did I miss something? Did you see my butt?” -Patrick

42. SpongeBob: Quick, Patrick, without thinking, if you could have anything right now, what would it be?

Patrick: Um… More time for thinking.

43. “I’m so loyal, I don’t mind sleeping out in the cold, hard ground while Captain Krabs sleeps in his warm, dry tent.” -SpongeBob

44. “I’ll have you know that I stubbed my toe last week and only cried for 20 minutes.” -SpongeBob

45. “That’s it, mister! You just lost your brain privileges!” -Plankton

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46. “Please come again. When I’m not working.” -Squidward

47. “I know of a place where you never get harmed. A magical place with magical charm. Indoors. Indoors. Indoors!” -SpongeBob

48. “Run Mr. Krabs! Run like you’re not in a coma!” -SpongeBob

49. “Moss always points to civilization.” -SpongeBob

50. “You can’t fool me. I listen to public radio!” -Squidward

51. “I was trying to tell you that I was choking on snow but the snow melted and turned into water and I drank all the water now I’m better.” -Patrick

52. “Dumb people are always blissfully unaware of how dumb they really are…” -Patrick

53. “I knew I shouldn’t have gotten out of bed today.” -Squidward

54. “Hmmm, a five-letter word for happiness…money.” -Mr. Krabs

55. “Well, it’s no secret that the best thing about a secret is secretly telling someone your secret, thereby adding another secret to their secret collection of secrets, secretly.” -SpongeBob

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Featured image courtesy of Pixabay.